A dear friend of mine is wrestling with the different accounts of religion and of what/who God is. After a fabulous visit, I thought about what she said and wrote the following letter to her.
I would appreciate any comments and thoughts.
Dearest Friend,
I've been thinking a lot about what you said: God is Love.
yes, that is ABSOLUTELY true, but, my love, it is only a part of the story. Mind you, it is the BEST part, but it is the best part because of what comes before it:
So, I share what the "gospel" really is with my most precious friend.
Going to the personality of God, we must first remember that He is God, and we are not, so we can only understand God through ourselves, which is ultimately inadequate. This is why we have scripture (and sometimes disagreement :-) ).
the four atributes of God:
1)God is perfectly Holy/Pure: He cannot be around that which is not perfectly pure. He cannot sin. He cannot violate his own law, nor simply "look over" when it is violated. Whether one believes we violated His law and commandments (they are pretty good - that top ten has yet to be beat!) through birth, or after, the fact is that we all have done so. We are, therefore, not pure or holy.
2) God is perfectly Just. When we have violated our relationship with him through sin, there must be penance. "The wages of sin is death." Pretty drastic, I know, but not when you even try to consider how perfect He is in His being and doing.
3) God is perfectly Merciful: God does not want us to die. He does not want us to be out of fellowship with Him. He wants to be with us, His creation for EVER. He wants to Love us...so..
4)God is perfectly Loving. This is where Jesus comes in. In the Old Testament, God required a sacrifice of a perfect Lamb from the Hebrews each year. This lamb died for the sins of the Hebrew people. However, even the Garden of Eden, God promised a savior one day. That savior is His son, Jesus Christ. "He that knew no sin, became sin for us that we might be Holy in Him."
Jesus died to pay the price for our sins because we could not pay for them ourselves. God made a way for us to be with Him forever! We must be pure to be with God, and the only way to be pure is cast our sin/transgression/disobedience on Christ. "I am the way, the truth, and the life. No one may come to the Father, but by me."
Many people simply call Jesus a great teacher, but no other teacher has said what he just said, and no other teacher in the world has ever done what he has done - conquered DEATH!
Jesus has given us a legacy of peace (not perfect easiness, but peace) if we will believe and follow Him. I hope you will be blessed by experiencing and living in His perfect Love forever through Jesus-the only way.
All MY LOVE, FOREVER,
Charly
I visited here today and thought that you would enjoy it too! - check this out at: http://wandascountryhome.com/trilogy/
Sunday, March 23, 2008
Sunday, March 2, 2008
Season of Suffering- part 1-the chronology
In the last two years, I went through a terrible issue of Depression and Anxiety. I didn’t know that was what it was until I was starting to come out of it. I’d like to describe a little bit of my descent, how I survived, and the recovery.
The pre-beginning was the announcement of our move to San Angelo, TX. I had become quite enamored with a more agrarian style of living…or the idea of it anyway. As a homeschooler, there is a wonderful movement toward a more simple and quite historic way of living. These ideas are ideas of order in the home (who wouldn’t love that?) a healthy relation between Father, Mother, and various aged children. It reflects on a time when families truly had solidarity. There were great benefits to families working as teams for the benefit of each other and those in need in the community. As a latch-key kid, child of divorce with the TV often as a babysitter, one can see how these ideas would be very attractive.
So, along with some other ideas in theology (which we still hold) we began attending a family-integrated church. Parts of it were awesome! The families were wonderful and genuine people. The worship was very fulfilling (not that fulfilling is the idea, but it was nice). Our daughter was nine and our son was close to two. This is when we began to notice problems. Our son just couldn’t “get with the program” and play along with the idea in my head of this wonderful family order. Please, dear reader, do not misunderstand: I expected him to be a two year old boy. I expected him to talk, ask questions, need distractions, etc.. However, the constant tantrums, the inability for any parenting “method” to speak to him and teach/train him as to what was expected was more than frustrating! He was difficult even for a two year old.
So, our announcement of the move came and with it another announcement: I was expecting our third child. How marvelous! An exciting adventure in a new place, a new baby, more homeschooling-which I love. Woo-Hoo! We moved when I was three months pregnant. We found a house to rent in a great neighborhood. My husband began his new assignment. I found a great midwife whom I trusted completely… the tantrums continued.
In November our third son was born. He was beautiful! The birth was amazing! Right after that, we began trying the Feingold diet for our other son. (It avoids food dyes, salicylates, and certain preservatives.) We saw a bit of an improvement. We were encouraged. However, when, by April-his fourth birthday- he was still having the awful tantrums, we knew it was time to start asking questions.
In short, through the next two years, we learned that our son was on the autism spectrum, has a mal-growth of his brain, needed a very strict diet: gfcf and did not ever get any real sleep, even when he did sleep. No wonder his usual answer to stress was to scream and throw whatever was in his hand. He would have “laughing seizures” and my daughter would have to take the baby so I could hold my son until he was done with his “fit”.
I developed a terrible depression. All my hopes, dreams, ideals, everything just crashed and burned. I cried for weeks. I slept. I cooked, but didn’t like to do so. Recognizing that I was NOT myself, I tried to reach out a bit. I joined some online communities regarding autism, gluten-free and more. But still I suffered. I didn’t want to hurt myself, but I just wished I could lay down and die. I went to mydoctor again and again. On a six week rotation, I would go into his office and say, “I’m tired and my hair is falling out. I’m stressed.” Then, I would start crying. My doctor sent me to a dermatologist for the hair, ran thyroid panels and told me to get a counselor.
My dermatologist told me to take Biotin, the thyroid panels were perfect, and no counselors were available. Finally, my dear husband had a dear, dear friend call me and all she said was, “How are you” and I started crying uncontrollably. Fortunately for me, my dear friend was the wife of the Senior Protestant Chaplain on base. The two of them came over. He gave me counseling sessions, contacted my doctor, and got me the help I really needed; compassion and even some medication.
After years of being on the “alert” for my son’s tantrums to help him not hurt others… My stress level was sky high! There was never a break because I couldn’t trust anyone else to watch him. San Angelo is not a large town and with his bizarre behavior, I found it difficult to be connected. My two saving graces were my neighbors and my MOPS group. (Mothers of Preschoolers).
We finally moved back to San Antonio thanks to the Air Force and by this time, both my son and I were on special diets and medication to assist us. I am happy to say that now, months later, my medication is down to almost nothing. My son is much better, but the real story here is what I learned from this which will be in the next post….. To be continued….
The pre-beginning was the announcement of our move to San Angelo, TX. I had become quite enamored with a more agrarian style of living…or the idea of it anyway. As a homeschooler, there is a wonderful movement toward a more simple and quite historic way of living. These ideas are ideas of order in the home (who wouldn’t love that?) a healthy relation between Father, Mother, and various aged children. It reflects on a time when families truly had solidarity. There were great benefits to families working as teams for the benefit of each other and those in need in the community. As a latch-key kid, child of divorce with the TV often as a babysitter, one can see how these ideas would be very attractive.
So, along with some other ideas in theology (which we still hold) we began attending a family-integrated church. Parts of it were awesome! The families were wonderful and genuine people. The worship was very fulfilling (not that fulfilling is the idea, but it was nice). Our daughter was nine and our son was close to two. This is when we began to notice problems. Our son just couldn’t “get with the program” and play along with the idea in my head of this wonderful family order. Please, dear reader, do not misunderstand: I expected him to be a two year old boy. I expected him to talk, ask questions, need distractions, etc.. However, the constant tantrums, the inability for any parenting “method” to speak to him and teach/train him as to what was expected was more than frustrating! He was difficult even for a two year old.
So, our announcement of the move came and with it another announcement: I was expecting our third child. How marvelous! An exciting adventure in a new place, a new baby, more homeschooling-which I love. Woo-Hoo! We moved when I was three months pregnant. We found a house to rent in a great neighborhood. My husband began his new assignment. I found a great midwife whom I trusted completely… the tantrums continued.
In November our third son was born. He was beautiful! The birth was amazing! Right after that, we began trying the Feingold diet for our other son. (It avoids food dyes, salicylates, and certain preservatives.) We saw a bit of an improvement. We were encouraged. However, when, by April-his fourth birthday- he was still having the awful tantrums, we knew it was time to start asking questions.
In short, through the next two years, we learned that our son was on the autism spectrum, has a mal-growth of his brain, needed a very strict diet: gfcf and did not ever get any real sleep, even when he did sleep. No wonder his usual answer to stress was to scream and throw whatever was in his hand. He would have “laughing seizures” and my daughter would have to take the baby so I could hold my son until he was done with his “fit”.
I developed a terrible depression. All my hopes, dreams, ideals, everything just crashed and burned. I cried for weeks. I slept. I cooked, but didn’t like to do so. Recognizing that I was NOT myself, I tried to reach out a bit. I joined some online communities regarding autism, gluten-free and more. But still I suffered. I didn’t want to hurt myself, but I just wished I could lay down and die. I went to mydoctor again and again. On a six week rotation, I would go into his office and say, “I’m tired and my hair is falling out. I’m stressed.” Then, I would start crying. My doctor sent me to a dermatologist for the hair, ran thyroid panels and told me to get a counselor.
My dermatologist told me to take Biotin, the thyroid panels were perfect, and no counselors were available. Finally, my dear husband had a dear, dear friend call me and all she said was, “How are you” and I started crying uncontrollably. Fortunately for me, my dear friend was the wife of the Senior Protestant Chaplain on base. The two of them came over. He gave me counseling sessions, contacted my doctor, and got me the help I really needed; compassion and even some medication.
After years of being on the “alert” for my son’s tantrums to help him not hurt others… My stress level was sky high! There was never a break because I couldn’t trust anyone else to watch him. San Angelo is not a large town and with his bizarre behavior, I found it difficult to be connected. My two saving graces were my neighbors and my MOPS group. (Mothers of Preschoolers).
We finally moved back to San Antonio thanks to the Air Force and by this time, both my son and I were on special diets and medication to assist us. I am happy to say that now, months later, my medication is down to almost nothing. My son is much better, but the real story here is what I learned from this which will be in the next post….. To be continued….
Monday, February 25, 2008
CBS News "Shocked" most American are Religious
Tonight the CBS evening news opened an article on “Religion in the U.S.” [or America, I’m not sure] with the following statistic stated and even printed in large letters/numbers for us to see:
Of the 225 Million people in the US, 183 Million are affiliated with Religion.
They went on to say that this figure “shocks” experts…um…DUH!!!
This certainly seems to be another wonderful example of the “experts” living in some far distant ivory tower while the rest of us, go to work, raise our children, shop at the grocery store and…surprise..GO TO CHURCH! The “get to know you question” changes from area to area (in DC, it’s “what do you do”) and in much of the country, it is some variety of “where does your family go to church?” A quick walk into any American coffee shop in real-town America will reveal quickly this very fact - people go to church.
This is NOT a new phenomenon. Alexis de Tocqueville in “Democracy in America” devoted major portions of his musings on his journey across America to our faith and its practice even noting its necessity to the endurance of a free nation:
“For my own part, I doubt whether man can ever support at the same time complete religious independence and entire political freedom. And I am inclined to think that, if faith be wanting in him, he must be subject; and if he be free, he must believe.” [Volume II, Chapter V]
So, yet again, We The People are insulted by both the “experts” and “CBS News”. Not content to let us live and be happy, the news broadcast noted that for a developed nation it was very unusual for there to be such a high number of “believers” in one faith or another.
However, to add insult to injury, when going to the CBS news website, the article is now retitled as: Many in U.S. Drop Their Childhood Religion. While the on-air article focused on the large numbers of Americans who have a major belief, the article would like to immediately give us the impression that Americans are leaving their faith in droves. http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/02/25/national/main3873100.shtml
If one reads the article, it becomes immediately obvious that mostly, folks are leaving one type of Christianity for another. Sometimes, it is even that people leave their church because (gasp!) they moved! Both of these facts merely seem to remind me of my own experience in “religion”. This experience is by no means unusual. As I grew up, I started to ask questions and do research. As my convictions were moved due to both reason and supernatural influences, my husband and I chose different places for our family to worship God. Also, as a military family, changing churches is a fact of life. I think the mere fact that people search out a new church after a move is a wonderful testimony to the amount of faith still very prominent in the United States!
Despite what we read in mainstream media, I think Alexis de Tocqueville would still be generally impressed. Mostly, I believe that our Sovereign God knows all about the foolishness of changing churches and of ridiculous articles intended to injure us regular folk.
Of the 225 Million people in the US, 183 Million are affiliated with Religion.
They went on to say that this figure “shocks” experts…um…DUH!!!
This certainly seems to be another wonderful example of the “experts” living in some far distant ivory tower while the rest of us, go to work, raise our children, shop at the grocery store and…surprise..GO TO CHURCH! The “get to know you question” changes from area to area (in DC, it’s “what do you do”) and in much of the country, it is some variety of “where does your family go to church?” A quick walk into any American coffee shop in real-town America will reveal quickly this very fact - people go to church.
This is NOT a new phenomenon. Alexis de Tocqueville in “Democracy in America” devoted major portions of his musings on his journey across America to our faith and its practice even noting its necessity to the endurance of a free nation:
“For my own part, I doubt whether man can ever support at the same time complete religious independence and entire political freedom. And I am inclined to think that, if faith be wanting in him, he must be subject; and if he be free, he must believe.” [Volume II, Chapter V]
So, yet again, We The People are insulted by both the “experts” and “CBS News”. Not content to let us live and be happy, the news broadcast noted that for a developed nation it was very unusual for there to be such a high number of “believers” in one faith or another.
However, to add insult to injury, when going to the CBS news website, the article is now retitled as: Many in U.S. Drop Their Childhood Religion. While the on-air article focused on the large numbers of Americans who have a major belief, the article would like to immediately give us the impression that Americans are leaving their faith in droves. http://www.cbsnews.com/stories/2008/02/25/national/main3873100.shtml
If one reads the article, it becomes immediately obvious that mostly, folks are leaving one type of Christianity for another. Sometimes, it is even that people leave their church because (gasp!) they moved! Both of these facts merely seem to remind me of my own experience in “religion”. This experience is by no means unusual. As I grew up, I started to ask questions and do research. As my convictions were moved due to both reason and supernatural influences, my husband and I chose different places for our family to worship God. Also, as a military family, changing churches is a fact of life. I think the mere fact that people search out a new church after a move is a wonderful testimony to the amount of faith still very prominent in the United States!
Despite what we read in mainstream media, I think Alexis de Tocqueville would still be generally impressed. Mostly, I believe that our Sovereign God knows all about the foolishness of changing churches and of ridiculous articles intended to injure us regular folk.
Thursday, January 31, 2008
The Value of Standardized Testing?
One of the questions I am most asked is, “How do you know your child is learning what he/she needs to know?” Another way of putting this question (and what the asker really means)is, “How do you know your child is keeping up with the children in public school?”
My gut reaction (which I suppress) is to ask a question in return: “Is that really what I want for my children?” Instead I have always assured the individual that I am a cool homeschool mom. While I don’t have to, I do check what my children are learning against a variety of scopes and sequences of various curricula. I also tell the person that about once a year I go to the Texas Education Association (TEA) website to check on things and give my daughter some published versions of their standardized tests, just to see how she’s doing.
I will say such things no more after what happened with this week’s tests. I SHOULD have learned my lesson two years ago when I gave her the 10th grade Social Studies test and she passed it with an A+. She was 10 years old at the time. The first question was: Who was President of the United States during the Civil War. NO KIDDING!
So now, on to this last week’s tests. My daughter is learning Algebra this year. (For those curious, we are using “Elementary Algebra” by Harold R. Jacobs ) So, I decided to give her the TAKS 9th grade math test. It was difficult, she did need some help understanding the test (as she doesn’t ever do multiple choice here at home – you do it until it’s right.) She got a 75% on the test. Since she hasn’t even finished the book yet, I was well pleased. It was an excellent learning experience for her. She had to work, think, and was able to see where she will be headed next in her math career.
Here’s the kicker: According to the information we could find (and it was difficult) her score would put her in the top 15% of 9th graders! She’s only of 7th grade age! Well, good for her! Not everyone can do this and she certainly has academic areas where she struggles-same as everybody. However, then I started looking at what these test scores mean for schools’ ratings.
As evidenced by the chart on this website: http://www.scuc.txed.net/PDFS/Accountability/2007districtratingtable.pdf , for a school to be “Academically Acceptable”, the majority of it’s test taking students must receive between a ~50% (45-60% depending on subject is a passing grade) and a 70% on the TAKS. This is pitiful! So, when I look online and see this rating, I say to myself, “Gee that school has students who made between an ‘F’ and a ‘C’ on THE main test of the year.”
For a school to be “Recognized”, it’s overall scores must be between 75% and 90%. Great. This school has ‘C’ and up students. Okay, we’ve all gotten a ‘C’ at least once.
My point is twofold: 1) As you can see by the requirements of passing this “great standardized test” my child being at grade level is NOT my major goal in my homeschooling. Also, I strongly suspect that in general, these ratings cheat the students and teachers of these schools. Is 50% and up the best we can hope for when education is mass produced? Is this a case of quality goes down when quantity goes up? (Though, I have to say that if a school cannot even achieve the “Academically Acceptable” rating, I would be a very nervous parent sending my child to school there.)
In a final note, we gave my daughter the 11th grade exit exam in English and she SMOKED it! So, we’ve decided to just focus on making sure she has the skills she needs to take the PSAT and SAT; the test that will count for something. Knowing how to take tests is a skill even after school. I’ve taken one math and two overall intelligence tests for various jobs I’ve held.
My gut reaction (which I suppress) is to ask a question in return: “Is that really what I want for my children?” Instead I have always assured the individual that I am a cool homeschool mom. While I don’t have to, I do check what my children are learning against a variety of scopes and sequences of various curricula. I also tell the person that about once a year I go to the Texas Education Association (TEA) website to check on things and give my daughter some published versions of their standardized tests, just to see how she’s doing.
I will say such things no more after what happened with this week’s tests. I SHOULD have learned my lesson two years ago when I gave her the 10th grade Social Studies test and she passed it with an A+. She was 10 years old at the time. The first question was: Who was President of the United States during the Civil War. NO KIDDING!
So now, on to this last week’s tests. My daughter is learning Algebra this year. (For those curious, we are using “Elementary Algebra” by Harold R. Jacobs ) So, I decided to give her the TAKS 9th grade math test. It was difficult, she did need some help understanding the test (as she doesn’t ever do multiple choice here at home – you do it until it’s right.) She got a 75% on the test. Since she hasn’t even finished the book yet, I was well pleased. It was an excellent learning experience for her. She had to work, think, and was able to see where she will be headed next in her math career.
Here’s the kicker: According to the information we could find (and it was difficult) her score would put her in the top 15% of 9th graders! She’s only of 7th grade age! Well, good for her! Not everyone can do this and she certainly has academic areas where she struggles-same as everybody. However, then I started looking at what these test scores mean for schools’ ratings.
As evidenced by the chart on this website: http://www.scuc.txed.net/PDFS/Accountability/2007districtratingtable.pdf , for a school to be “Academically Acceptable”, the majority of it’s test taking students must receive between a ~50% (45-60% depending on subject is a passing grade) and a 70% on the TAKS. This is pitiful! So, when I look online and see this rating, I say to myself, “Gee that school has students who made between an ‘F’ and a ‘C’ on THE main test of the year.”
For a school to be “Recognized”, it’s overall scores must be between 75% and 90%. Great. This school has ‘C’ and up students. Okay, we’ve all gotten a ‘C’ at least once.
My point is twofold: 1) As you can see by the requirements of passing this “great standardized test” my child being at grade level is NOT my major goal in my homeschooling. Also, I strongly suspect that in general, these ratings cheat the students and teachers of these schools. Is 50% and up the best we can hope for when education is mass produced? Is this a case of quality goes down when quantity goes up? (Though, I have to say that if a school cannot even achieve the “Academically Acceptable” rating, I would be a very nervous parent sending my child to school there.)
In a final note, we gave my daughter the 11th grade exit exam in English and she SMOKED it! So, we’ve decided to just focus on making sure she has the skills she needs to take the PSAT and SAT; the test that will count for something. Knowing how to take tests is a skill even after school. I’ve taken one math and two overall intelligence tests for various jobs I’ve held.
Saturday, January 26, 2008
ADHD.Autism.Therapies, OH, MY!!
ADHD THERAPY
*Please note that the following is a result of several years of my own research and personal experience. I am NOT a doctor, I’m just a mom sharing what I have discovered.
I know there is a HUGE debate as to whether or not ADHD really does exist. While I will agree that there is little grace in both the medical (and sadly Christian as well) communities on this topic, here is my opinion:
1. ADHD does exist. In it’s truest form, it is known as a deficiency in the neurotransmitter Dopamine. Stimulant Drugs such as Ritalin, Strattera, etc.. can increase dopamine. So can Phenylalanine which is in many “energy” drinks. Our family’s favorite is “Spark” by a direct sales company called “Advocare”. It has phenylalanie, multiple vitamins, B vitamins and caffeine. If you are curious if your child has ADHD, this could be a route you might want to investigate, but not before you know about the following.
2. Other issues that LOOK like ADHD, complete with it’s agitation and anxiety could be a variety of factors such as allergies (IgE) or intolerances (IgG). Also, many, many people find they cannot tolerate something as simple as…artificial food dye! If anyone came to me and said their child or themselves were having serious trouble focusing or just getting along in a structured environment, I would ask what their diet is.
3. While I’m talking about non-food stuff that’s in our food, I’d like to talk about the following BHT, BHA, & TBHQ. My family does not have a problem with the last one, but the others are pure emotional train wreck for us! The only way to find out is to eliminate it for a minimum of a month, then to reintroduce it to see how everyone feels.
4. After all the junk (especially food dye) has been eliminated, if the results are still not ideal, I would try supplementation. Two major factors which can help are magnesium and zinc. Just a note about magnesium: you can’t OD on it. As soon as stools are extremely loose, back off of it, and that’s about it. The thing to know about Zinc is that it can give you a serious tummy ache. Metagenics makes a “Zinc Drink” which is pretty effective. If you don’t have enough Zinc, it tastes like nothing. If you have plenty, it tastes awful! We knew my son didn’t have enough because the rest of us couldn’t stand the stuff and he had NO problem with it (when he was very particular about anything else that went in his mouth).
5. Another MAJOR wonderful supplement is the Omegas! Omega 3 gets ME through the day without severe agitation. Many nutritionists who want you to pay for their program will tell you to seriously UP your Omega’s. For my daughter, we’ve added Evening Primrose Oil to help her with puberty, but that’s another story.
6. After you’ve done all this, if you don’t want to spend a lot of money on an ADHD specialist doctor (we used Dr. Mary Ann Block out of Dallas and were VERY pleased with her!) try going completely casein (that is the Dairy PROTEIN) and gluten free. I’ll have more on this later. Note: if casein and/or gluten are a problem, the casein takes about two weeks to “get out” of the system and there will be a withdrawl. It can take as much as six months for gluten to leave the body; sometimes longer.
So, my own personal summary about ADHD, first (to introduce a topic in the summary…oops) feel free to investigate ALL autism nutritional and therapeutic information. Much of it would be beneficial. Please remember the following: 1. Remove ALL artificial food dye, this will be in the ingredients at the end and will look like FD&C [color] #1 (or some other number). Please remember to do this with MEDICINE as well. We insist on only food dye free prescriptions and OTC medicines. They are available now. 2. Eliminate some of those nasty preservatives. BHT, BHA, TBHQ to see which might be triggers. 3. Try something to stimulate Dopamine if focus is an issue. 4. If the issue is agitation, try magnesium and/or zinc. 5. Add omega’s (for kids, Nordic Naturals makes a ‘strawberry burst’ fish oil my kids LOVE) Omegas are also great for heart health and brain function. 6. Try eliminating casein and gluten OR go to an allergist.
If you are wondering, our own son is on a gfcf diet http://www.gfcfdiet.com/, he is a diagnosed celiac as well (that took a long time). He also avoids oranges due to IgG testing. No one in my house except my dh has any artificial food dye. My son also cannot have chocolate because he is on the medicine Clonidine. (which lowers both blood pressure AND dopamine – he is autistic, not adhd). We are under the care of a dietitian. After very careful and thorough evaluation by our neurologist, he is also on a number of medicines which truly help him to have the tools to function as a happy child.
My daughter is casein free due to the same testing. She can have spark, but my son cannot. She and I both react terribly to artificial food dye with only a few exceptions.
*Please note that the following is a result of several years of my own research and personal experience. I am NOT a doctor, I’m just a mom sharing what I have discovered.
I know there is a HUGE debate as to whether or not ADHD really does exist. While I will agree that there is little grace in both the medical (and sadly Christian as well) communities on this topic, here is my opinion:
1. ADHD does exist. In it’s truest form, it is known as a deficiency in the neurotransmitter Dopamine. Stimulant Drugs such as Ritalin, Strattera, etc.. can increase dopamine. So can Phenylalanine which is in many “energy” drinks. Our family’s favorite is “Spark” by a direct sales company called “Advocare”. It has phenylalanie, multiple vitamins, B vitamins and caffeine. If you are curious if your child has ADHD, this could be a route you might want to investigate, but not before you know about the following.
2. Other issues that LOOK like ADHD, complete with it’s agitation and anxiety could be a variety of factors such as allergies (IgE) or intolerances (IgG). Also, many, many people find they cannot tolerate something as simple as…artificial food dye! If anyone came to me and said their child or themselves were having serious trouble focusing or just getting along in a structured environment, I would ask what their diet is.
3. While I’m talking about non-food stuff that’s in our food, I’d like to talk about the following BHT, BHA, & TBHQ. My family does not have a problem with the last one, but the others are pure emotional train wreck for us! The only way to find out is to eliminate it for a minimum of a month, then to reintroduce it to see how everyone feels.
4. After all the junk (especially food dye) has been eliminated, if the results are still not ideal, I would try supplementation. Two major factors which can help are magnesium and zinc. Just a note about magnesium: you can’t OD on it. As soon as stools are extremely loose, back off of it, and that’s about it. The thing to know about Zinc is that it can give you a serious tummy ache. Metagenics makes a “Zinc Drink” which is pretty effective. If you don’t have enough Zinc, it tastes like nothing. If you have plenty, it tastes awful! We knew my son didn’t have enough because the rest of us couldn’t stand the stuff and he had NO problem with it (when he was very particular about anything else that went in his mouth).
5. Another MAJOR wonderful supplement is the Omegas! Omega 3 gets ME through the day without severe agitation. Many nutritionists who want you to pay for their program will tell you to seriously UP your Omega’s. For my daughter, we’ve added Evening Primrose Oil to help her with puberty, but that’s another story.
6. After you’ve done all this, if you don’t want to spend a lot of money on an ADHD specialist doctor (we used Dr. Mary Ann Block out of Dallas and were VERY pleased with her!) try going completely casein (that is the Dairy PROTEIN) and gluten free. I’ll have more on this later. Note: if casein and/or gluten are a problem, the casein takes about two weeks to “get out” of the system and there will be a withdrawl. It can take as much as six months for gluten to leave the body; sometimes longer.
So, my own personal summary about ADHD, first (to introduce a topic in the summary…oops) feel free to investigate ALL autism nutritional and therapeutic information. Much of it would be beneficial. Please remember the following: 1. Remove ALL artificial food dye, this will be in the ingredients at the end and will look like FD&C [color] #1 (or some other number). Please remember to do this with MEDICINE as well. We insist on only food dye free prescriptions and OTC medicines. They are available now. 2. Eliminate some of those nasty preservatives. BHT, BHA, TBHQ to see which might be triggers. 3. Try something to stimulate Dopamine if focus is an issue. 4. If the issue is agitation, try magnesium and/or zinc. 5. Add omega’s (for kids, Nordic Naturals makes a ‘strawberry burst’ fish oil my kids LOVE) Omegas are also great for heart health and brain function. 6. Try eliminating casein and gluten OR go to an allergist.
If you are wondering, our own son is on a gfcf diet http://www.gfcfdiet.com/, he is a diagnosed celiac as well (that took a long time). He also avoids oranges due to IgG testing. No one in my house except my dh has any artificial food dye. My son also cannot have chocolate because he is on the medicine Clonidine. (which lowers both blood pressure AND dopamine – he is autistic, not adhd). We are under the care of a dietitian. After very careful and thorough evaluation by our neurologist, he is also on a number of medicines which truly help him to have the tools to function as a happy child.
My daughter is casein free due to the same testing. She can have spark, but my son cannot. She and I both react terribly to artificial food dye with only a few exceptions.
Thursday, January 24, 2008
Response to Dr. Phil Homeschooling Show
Below is the letter I sent to Dr. Phil. He did a show on homeschooling which almost tried to be positive, but then was a setup. It was definately a show for ratings. I'm fairly certain he did it to elicit a response, and he got one. Many, many people have blogged and written. I'm using his show as an excuse for a blog entry on homeschooling: enjoy!
Dear Dr. Phil,
I should say, my poor, dear Dr. Phil. I am so sorry that you chose to do a show about homeschooling. It is apparent that you lack experience and genuine exposure to the homeschooling lifestyle. While I do appreciate that you have homeschooling “helps” linked to your website, you overall negative portrayal of what is far more than a decision regarding education will only prove harmful to many American families.
Those of us who are decidedly pro-homeschooling usually know how to defend our position, if we even care to do so. Those who are decidedly anti-homeschooling also know how to defend their position. Your show could only hope to help those who are undecided. It did no such thing. While you were sure to show a young lady who did not enjoy her homeschooling experience, you sorely neglected to show one who did. As with any parenting/home situation, there is such a variety of experience that a one-hour show could not possibly cover such a broad topic. For a family considering this avenue, your show would only help to inflame areas of potential disagreement.
There are several areas with which I have issue:
1. Socialization. According to the National Home Education Research Institute www.nheri.org , their research shows that, in general, homeschoolers come out of their developmental and teen years with far superior social skills. They are far more likely to be socially and civically active..sometimes by as much as 70% over their traditional schooled counterparts.
2. Unschooling. Many homeschoolers use a variety of education options in their “school”. The home IS the school. If you were to spend some time at a homeschool co-op and quiz the parents and children there, you would see such variety of education! Some children are very late readers and need the unschooling/hands on approach. (My own children planted a garden with me lately.) In our own home, we use textbooks, videos, competitions, field trips, vacations, biographies, literature, the library, community activities, and just plain old play – really:just like a traditional school would. We also unschool quite a bit. For instance, my children went on a worm-hunt for fun after a rain. When they came inside, we pulled out some books on worms, and looked up pictures on the internet. Most homeschoolers and many traditional schoolers “unschool” – it’s called having a conversation.
3. Homeschooling through High School. Homeschoolers have some very distinct advantages when homeschooling through High School. My daughter is one example in that she is ready and able to begin ninth grade work – she is 12. She is not the exception. Many homeschoolers choose to begin their high school early. If she chooses, she could graduate and begin college early.
a. A second benefit is that she has the flexibility in her schedule to take dual-credit classes if she chooses. She can take classes at the local college for both high-school and college credit. Then she would graduate HS as a college sophomore.
b. Also, due to the flexibility of schedule, the homeschooler is able to begin participating in the real world as soon as they are ready. I know of one young lady who interned at a veterinarian clinic for half of her HS day, and did her schoolwork the other half.
c. Socially-there are many opportunities for homeschooled high-schoolers to interact with their peers. Our own co-op is hosting a spring formal.
Sir, these are just a few issues. In general, the misconceptions and prejudices about homeschooling which pervade the common consciousness are nothing more than hearsay. In my letter, I have not even begun to address the number of situations when homeschooling becomes necessary such as medical and special need situations. Would you put undo strain on those families by accusing them of making a mentally unhealthy decision (with objections easily overcome by the way)? I also did not touch on the fact that many of our nations early leaders were never “formally” schooled (ie. Patrick Henry) or that most of early America was not “formally” schooled – and at that time, we had the most healthy community situation (barring some socially acceptable practices such as slavery) and our nation’s literacy rate was near 97%!
Indeed, I do hope you will reconsider your approach to such a volatile topic. This is an issue which can and has divided families due to the misinformation running rampant in this age of “experts”.
The last and most personal issue is of the “age of experts” in which we now live; many of us (especially those like myself who were latch-key kids) are grateful for the opportunity we have in America to be personally involved in the raising and education of our children. We choose to be involved on a daily, hourly level and to raise our children ourselves. We don’t want the “experts” raising and educating our children.
Thank you for your time and attention.
Dear Dr. Phil,
I should say, my poor, dear Dr. Phil. I am so sorry that you chose to do a show about homeschooling. It is apparent that you lack experience and genuine exposure to the homeschooling lifestyle. While I do appreciate that you have homeschooling “helps” linked to your website, you overall negative portrayal of what is far more than a decision regarding education will only prove harmful to many American families.
Those of us who are decidedly pro-homeschooling usually know how to defend our position, if we even care to do so. Those who are decidedly anti-homeschooling also know how to defend their position. Your show could only hope to help those who are undecided. It did no such thing. While you were sure to show a young lady who did not enjoy her homeschooling experience, you sorely neglected to show one who did. As with any parenting/home situation, there is such a variety of experience that a one-hour show could not possibly cover such a broad topic. For a family considering this avenue, your show would only help to inflame areas of potential disagreement.
There are several areas with which I have issue:
1. Socialization. According to the National Home Education Research Institute www.nheri.org , their research shows that, in general, homeschoolers come out of their developmental and teen years with far superior social skills. They are far more likely to be socially and civically active..sometimes by as much as 70% over their traditional schooled counterparts.
2. Unschooling. Many homeschoolers use a variety of education options in their “school”. The home IS the school. If you were to spend some time at a homeschool co-op and quiz the parents and children there, you would see such variety of education! Some children are very late readers and need the unschooling/hands on approach. (My own children planted a garden with me lately.) In our own home, we use textbooks, videos, competitions, field trips, vacations, biographies, literature, the library, community activities, and just plain old play – really:just like a traditional school would. We also unschool quite a bit. For instance, my children went on a worm-hunt for fun after a rain. When they came inside, we pulled out some books on worms, and looked up pictures on the internet. Most homeschoolers and many traditional schoolers “unschool” – it’s called having a conversation.
3. Homeschooling through High School. Homeschoolers have some very distinct advantages when homeschooling through High School. My daughter is one example in that she is ready and able to begin ninth grade work – she is 12. She is not the exception. Many homeschoolers choose to begin their high school early. If she chooses, she could graduate and begin college early.
a. A second benefit is that she has the flexibility in her schedule to take dual-credit classes if she chooses. She can take classes at the local college for both high-school and college credit. Then she would graduate HS as a college sophomore.
b. Also, due to the flexibility of schedule, the homeschooler is able to begin participating in the real world as soon as they are ready. I know of one young lady who interned at a veterinarian clinic for half of her HS day, and did her schoolwork the other half.
c. Socially-there are many opportunities for homeschooled high-schoolers to interact with their peers. Our own co-op is hosting a spring formal.
Sir, these are just a few issues. In general, the misconceptions and prejudices about homeschooling which pervade the common consciousness are nothing more than hearsay. In my letter, I have not even begun to address the number of situations when homeschooling becomes necessary such as medical and special need situations. Would you put undo strain on those families by accusing them of making a mentally unhealthy decision (with objections easily overcome by the way)? I also did not touch on the fact that many of our nations early leaders were never “formally” schooled (ie. Patrick Henry) or that most of early America was not “formally” schooled – and at that time, we had the most healthy community situation (barring some socially acceptable practices such as slavery) and our nation’s literacy rate was near 97%!
Indeed, I do hope you will reconsider your approach to such a volatile topic. This is an issue which can and has divided families due to the misinformation running rampant in this age of “experts”.
The last and most personal issue is of the “age of experts” in which we now live; many of us (especially those like myself who were latch-key kids) are grateful for the opportunity we have in America to be personally involved in the raising and education of our children. We choose to be involved on a daily, hourly level and to raise our children ourselves. We don’t want the “experts” raising and educating our children.
Thank you for your time and attention.
Saturday, January 19, 2008
From Sales Executive to Homeschool Mom
You’ve seen ‘em… The very large family, dresses only wearing, maybe even headcovering having homeschoolers. Well, while I do know many families who have those convictions (and greatly respect their decisions) there are actually many, many different types of people who homeschool.
I have friends who homeschool for some or all of the following reasons:
1. To help their children academically excel
2. To take education at a more natural pace be it accelerated or delayed
3. For religious reasons
4. Due to frustration with the school system
5. For family solidarity
6. Because their child has special needs
7. For the flexibility of schedule (we went to New England-Rev. War, DC-Inauguration, and Disney one year! Another, we had TONS of doctor’s visits for my son-ASD)
8. For a customized, tutorial education
9. Because they move a lot
10. Because they just like their children, love to learn and ENJOY teaching!
Like many homeschool moms, I had a life before homeschooling. And like many moms, that life has helped me very much, though never quite in ways that I expected. As a former Technical Sales Executive, I knew that I always loved sales. I also really loved learning-you have to know a lot about your product to be good. While those things obviously did help me in my enthusiasm for homeschooling (I read everything I could about education and learning styles for about 4 years until I had exhausted the available material) what really helped was…. Learning my client. That’s right, my children are, of course children, but they are the ‘client’ as it were.
If I fail to understand a client, I cannot communicate with them and we have no relationship. The skill of listening to and trying to understand clients became invaluable as a parent. There is no person in the entire world I desire to know, communicate with, and have relationship than my family; my children especially. In sales, I always came in with an agenda- to represent a product to a client. . To achieve my agenda, I first had to get to know my client, ask questions; lots of them, observe, and try to understand how my client was thinking.
In homeschooling, my agenda is to provide my children with academic material, help them learn, and instill a love of learning. With my children, I WANTED to simply go for the “empty vessel” idea where their minds are an empty vessel and I just have to “fill it up”. This approach did not work in a one on one environment. First of all, if they already knew something, boredom and restlessness would take over. Second, if there was little to no understanding, no matter how many different and creative ways I tried, I was frustrated. So, I decided to slow things down a bit. I did a bit of “unschooling” where materials are readily available to see where their interests would lead them. I was not disappointed. Their interests, when give the opportunity to flourish, included Russian History and Political Science for my older child. It included numbers in any fashion for my second child-and we use that to introduce new information. My youngest is just two, but the influence of his older siblings has already infected him. He has a very natural mechanical intuitiveness and is a very tactile learner.
This is a major thing that makes what I do very rewarding, fulfilling and joyful! While we do have workbooks and such in our house, our home is more like one big school experiment all the time. School is ALWAYS in session in one way or another. Veritas!
I have friends who homeschool for some or all of the following reasons:
1. To help their children academically excel
2. To take education at a more natural pace be it accelerated or delayed
3. For religious reasons
4. Due to frustration with the school system
5. For family solidarity
6. Because their child has special needs
7. For the flexibility of schedule (we went to New England-Rev. War, DC-Inauguration, and Disney one year! Another, we had TONS of doctor’s visits for my son-ASD)
8. For a customized, tutorial education
9. Because they move a lot
10. Because they just like their children, love to learn and ENJOY teaching!
Like many homeschool moms, I had a life before homeschooling. And like many moms, that life has helped me very much, though never quite in ways that I expected. As a former Technical Sales Executive, I knew that I always loved sales. I also really loved learning-you have to know a lot about your product to be good. While those things obviously did help me in my enthusiasm for homeschooling (I read everything I could about education and learning styles for about 4 years until I had exhausted the available material) what really helped was…. Learning my client. That’s right, my children are, of course children, but they are the ‘client’ as it were.
If I fail to understand a client, I cannot communicate with them and we have no relationship. The skill of listening to and trying to understand clients became invaluable as a parent. There is no person in the entire world I desire to know, communicate with, and have relationship than my family; my children especially. In sales, I always came in with an agenda- to represent a product to a client. . To achieve my agenda, I first had to get to know my client, ask questions; lots of them, observe, and try to understand how my client was thinking.
In homeschooling, my agenda is to provide my children with academic material, help them learn, and instill a love of learning. With my children, I WANTED to simply go for the “empty vessel” idea where their minds are an empty vessel and I just have to “fill it up”. This approach did not work in a one on one environment. First of all, if they already knew something, boredom and restlessness would take over. Second, if there was little to no understanding, no matter how many different and creative ways I tried, I was frustrated. So, I decided to slow things down a bit. I did a bit of “unschooling” where materials are readily available to see where their interests would lead them. I was not disappointed. Their interests, when give the opportunity to flourish, included Russian History and Political Science for my older child. It included numbers in any fashion for my second child-and we use that to introduce new information. My youngest is just two, but the influence of his older siblings has already infected him. He has a very natural mechanical intuitiveness and is a very tactile learner.
This is a major thing that makes what I do very rewarding, fulfilling and joyful! While we do have workbooks and such in our house, our home is more like one big school experiment all the time. School is ALWAYS in session in one way or another. Veritas!
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